My Unrealistic Hopes for “Young Love.”

Thursday, December 29th, 2016

Now my experience in the relationship department is limited – in fact, we won’t explain in any further depth quite how limited because it might just undermine any value in the words that follow. But I do know one thing for certain: the ideas of young love and the way these feelings are being pursued are nothing more than a perfect testament to the brokenness of this world.

I go to a university with what is often described as a hook-up culture. Let’s sit on that for a second. A culture is simply the behaviors and beliefs of a specific group. Now, hooking up is a little more vague; it could mean a number of different things to a number of different people. Though, in it’s simplest interpretation it means interacting, often physically, with someone of the desired sex to some degree. There are behaviors and beliefs at these institutions built hundreds of years ago with the pure intention to produce better, more educated members of society that focus much attention on interactions of “hooking up.” And I’m beginning to believe there is no wrong in questioning how in the world we got here.

At what point did we decide it was not only socially acceptable but socially encouraged to begin these relationships and these actions of affection at such a young age. When did abstinence become synonymous with prudish and sexual activity become a measure of success. How did high school boys start convincing high school girls that they will feel worthier when they send photos of their uncovered bodies for the world to see. At what point did working towards a relationship become more appealing than working towards a college degree or a world-changing business venture. When did parents start allowing their children to believe their fulfillment can and should come from the opposite sex, and at what point did sex come to mean just about as much as a hand shake. How did we override the desire of God for us to “be holy and pure and to keep clear of all sexual sin so that each of you will marry in holiness and honor” (Thessalonians 4:3-4).

Really, the best answer and the only answer I can give you to this never-ending list is that we live in a broken world. And as much as I wish I could move mountains and convince every 15 year old girl that they are worthy of so much more, all I can do is pray. And write.

So here I present some words in a half-hearted attempt to savage the most broken of individuals. To the girl who can’t exit a relationship without a new one lined up, know that your happiness is not defined by a relationship status, rather it is by the comfort in knowing that the Lord knows the deepest desires of your heart and will open up the doors to help you achieve your greatest goals (Psalm 37:4). To the boy who flips through girls, using each one simply to get some sense of pleasure, know that females are not your toys to play with and none can provide a permanence of pleasure like a relationship with Christ. To the girl who wants nothing more than to be in a relationship and is willing to do anything to get there, know that there is Someone who wants a relationship with you more than any boy ever will. So be confident in your love for the Lord and find your delight in him, my friends. Work really really hard and serve the Kingdom to your greatest ability, because, in its due time, He will bring the right people to come knocking on that university dorm door – or at least that’s what I’m betting on.


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